March Madness + Tax Season = Stress Drinking

I am borderline obsessed with college basketball. March Madness is the greatest time of year for me. My man loves football like it's his job, and doesn't get how I can watch basketball for hours on end. I tried to tell him that it is pretty easy, especially with alcohol involved. But then there are the times that I have entered bracket pools and the teams I have picked either lose, or play the closest game EVER. When this happens, I tend to drink more, and by more, I mean that the drinks suddenly become more vodka, less mixer.

Like for instance, if I was drinking right now, I would be having about 3 shots to cope with UCLA's lack of skills. (It's 11-23 Villanova as I type this) When this happens, I tend to say fuck a lot more than normal, which means that I say fuck every other word instead of every third. It is also the middle of tax season and work is insane.

Oh, and my son has taken it upon himself to speak with a British accent. Conversations have been quite interesting around here.

Janie's Got A Gun...Or Just Some Questions

Last week the hilarious Janie asked if anyone would like to participate in a Q&A, naturally I told her I was game. I like a good Q&A, makes the time go by and you get to learn a little more about someone. So without further ado, here it goes.

Janie: How would you describe a typical day in your life?

Me: I typically wake up around 5:30 to get myself and little man ready for work and school. Drop him off, go to work, pick him up, make dinner, clean, watch mindless TV then crash. Glamorous I know. On the weekends I take it easy and have people over on Sundays for football and appetizers.

Janie: What are you most grateful for?

Me: I am grateful for my fabulous hair (it truly is), my boys, Coca-Cola, chocolate covered pretzels, martinis, wine (boxed or bottled) and snow.

Janie: I notice you like the “storyteller” songwriters – what draws you to them? ( I love Lucinda Williams!)

Me: I think I am drawn that kind of songwriting because it makes you think about things more. Whether the song is about love, heartbreak, annoyances, I think it helps you relate better to the subject. One of my all time favorite songs is Those Three Days by Lucinda Williams. When she sings this song, you can hear the pain in her soul. You feel her pain with her and you just want to tell her that whoever did that to her was an asshole and that there are WAY better men out there.

Janie: Why did you start blogging?

Me: I wanted to know that I am not the only one that is stressing out for what my man says is no reason. I have so much going on in my head that I forget to write down or forget to talk about. And, I am too lazy to write in a journal. Even though I buy one every time I am in B&N because they are pretty and on sale, I never write anything but a to do list in them. And when the little man finds one laying around, a garden is mysteriously drawn on several pages.

Janie: Who do you love, and what are you doing about it?

Me: I love my man and our son. I learned never to take anything for granted, even time. I cherish every day that I have with them. If my son wants to read, then I read with him. If my man wants to take a spontaneous drive, then I go. Life isn't guaranteed. Anyone you know could go at anytime, so please just surround yourself with the people you love and don't be afraid to tell them. Even if they say you tell them to much, it's better than not telling them at all. And if vodka were a man, I might just marry him because I love him.

Janie: If there were a movie of your life, what would be the title?

Me: Hmmm, that is a good question. The mom/responsible side would be called "Not Enough Time To Do All Of This Shit So Do It Yourself: A Lesson In How To Get Your Kid To Pick Up His God Damned Socks And Stop Leaving Them In The Middle Of The Floor" and the wild side would be called "How To Have A Great Time And Not Vomit"

Janie: Tell us a neat story about that kiddo of yours.

Me: While potty training little man almost 3 years ago (he started early thank God!!!), we would not let him get off of the training potty until he did what he had to do. So to pass the time, little man would sing his heart out. One night, after a few minutes of hearing him sing, it got awfully quiet. Too quiet actually. You parents know what I am talking about. It was the quiet where you know your kid is up to know good. So my man and I go to check on him, little did we know what we would see. We opened the bathroom door and found that little man had in fact gone to the bathroom, #2 to be exact. He let us know this because he used it as finger paint on the side of the bathtub, toilet, training potty and walls. Thank goodness we had bleach because my man scooped him up to throw him in our bathtub while I cleaned up the mess. It was a horrible night. From then on he was supervised when going potty.

I hope you enjoyed this Q&A as much as I did. If you would like to participate in one, please send me an email and I will be glad to ask you some questions. And be sure to check out Janie, she is hilarious!!! I'll give you the weekend update tomorrow and I promise it won't disappoint. My son called me a "butt shaker" at the holiday party, we went for the drive through the Appalachians and the Steelers lost...until tomorrow.

Bah Humbugh and the poor Ravens

For some reason, I am not a fan of the holidays this year. It may be because I have absolutely nothing done. I usually have our tree up the day after Thanksgiving along with all of the decorations. Ask me if I have done any of this...the answer is no. I only have the lighted garland up because it takes way less effort to do that then put up a whole tree. So since the box of decorations is open in our den, the kid has taken it upon himself to take things to decorate his room. So far he has stockings hung on his dresser, one of them is filled with pinecones and an empty candle box. He has lighted garland on top of his dresser. Garland around they door handles of his bedroom door and the closet doors. He has a wooden snowman in his window because he believes that Santa will be sure to see his friend and stop in. At least someone in the house has the holiday spirit. I have too much to get done and not enough time. Bah Humbugh.

Speaking of Bah Humbugh, I am sure that the Ravens fans are BITTER that the Steelers kicked their ass on Sunday. I personally laughed at our neighbors who earlier in the game, would come out to yell what the score was to the neighborhood. Once the Ravens started losing, they retreated into their homes and would not come out. I loved it.

One final note...if I am visibly in the middle of something, do not stand there and breathe heavily until I acknowledge you just so you can interrupt what I am doing to ask me 13,458 questions about something you have been doing longer than I have. Fuck off!!!! I do not do your job so how would I know how to do it better than you??? I need wine and it's only 10 a.m. I hate that feeling.

Friday funk

I am in a funk because it is after 6 on a Friday and I am just leaving work. All I have to say is a heavy handed bartender is in my future and maybe some dinner. Enjoy your weekend and Go Steelers!!!

Oh winter, how I love thee...

Some of you may have noticed that I have not posted in a while. Or maybe you didn't. The reason I haven't? Did I finally finish my book? Did I do something meaningful like donate old clothes to the Salvation Army? Did I spend quality time with family and friends? Did my man take me out by surprise?

I did NOT finish my book. Yet. I am in the middle of organizing/cleaning out the closets in the house and gathering things to donate to the Goodwill and Salvation Army so I am still in the process. I spent quality time with friends and family since we had them over for football/guitar hero battles on Sunday (I totally rock - on medium). And my man surprised me Saturday night and took me out to dinner sans little man. It was quite productive if I say so myself.

I was trying to get everything done by the first snow, but alas, I have failed. It snowed while at work today. It was only flurries but to me that still counts. Nothing stuck to the ground, but I still hope. I hope that we get covered in snow. Everything just looks so much prettier with the first real snow. People here in MD freak out like the apocolypse is coming if the weatherman calls for an INCH. But I think that is what I love about it. Just knowing that my mother will be one of the crazy people in line to get bread, eggs and toilet paper gives me sheer joy. It means that winter is here.

So tonight I am planning on locking myself in the bathroom after dinner to 1. clean it in peace, 2. dye my hair, 3. read while the color sets and 4. get away from guitar hero practice and High School Musical 2. Even though Zac Efron is HOT, I can not watch him sing and dance, even on mute. My little one is obsessed with this movie, which by the way was not purchased by us, but by my in-laws. I need girl time, I need sanity, and I need a room that has that. Oddly enough it's the bathroom for me. I have all of my makeup in there so in between chapters I can try the new mascara I just got and see how many different ways I can make myself hotter for my mans company party this weekend. Hopefully I will at least finish my book.

Brett Who? and a Sick Kid

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